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TNA Impact June 25th

    I would like to take this time to express some sort of emotion I don't usually feel towards the families of Michael Jackson. I'm not sure what it is that I want to say. I was a fan, but not a huge fan. It sucks that it died, but it sucks even more that the same time last year, the very same people who made fun of man will be the same people who'll jump down the throats of anyone who may not be a sheep and continue making the Jackson jokes - as overused as they are. Hey... isn't today the 1-year anniversary of the Benoit Tragedy?
 
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MATCH ONE
Brutus Magnus vs. Brother Ray
    Brother Ray attacks Brutus as Brutus was making his way to the ring. I will like to take this time to say that Brutus Magnus probably has the best name in wrestling today. So manly, even Chuck Norris would orgasm at the sound of it being muttered. Ray more or less dominated the match until British Invasion and Kiyoshi/Sheik came out to put a pummel on the guy. Devon comes out to save Ray and a 3D later, Team 3D stand tall.  I can't remember if Brother Ray won by DQ or if it was ruled a no contest. Things were rushed.
 
    Backstage, we see Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe arriving to the arena in a limo. What's-her-name is trying to get some answers, but the two kept ignoring her. I really don't blame them.
 
TIME-EATING SEGMENT
    Main Event Mafia make their way to the ring and we get to see Kurt Angle's awesome beard and his great receding hairline. I kid, I kid. It's a godly receding hairline. Angle calls out Joe into the ring and it's actually an approved move by the crowd.
    Angle talks more about how he told people that it was his idea to have Joe act this way out so.. y'know I'm lost. I'm just gonna say it was your usual "haha, SWEEEEEEEEEERVE" move by Russo, just a little more well done than usual. Yes, Sting doesn't know and Angle apologized about it.
    Foley makes his way out and demands an explanation. Angle... for some reason.. wants to see Foley cry. He goes on to explain that Foley's power has been cut and that he isn't a push over. He then proposes a chance to go into Foley's office and come up with a new agreement between them.
 
    Before the commercial, we see AJ arriving and looking for Joe. Of course, we get a shot of Billy Gunn showing up, gave three words, worked on a prop as a janitor would. Meh.
 
    We get a promote of Sanita debuting in the near future and Abyss makes his way out, complete with Kane's red-lighting. Afterwards, Nash walks his way out to the ring for a match.... uh-oh...
 
MATCH TWO
Nash defeated Abyss
    Of course they go to commercial and we come back with the two in the middle of their match. Amazing. Back and forth action until Dr. Stevie runs in and tazers Abyss behind the ref's back. Nash wins the match.
 
    Came back from a bathroom break during commercial and I see Booker T & Steiner yelling at Beer Money. Not sure about what.. Steiner's speaking a bunch of gibberish and Booker's voice sounds like someone impersonating Patrick Star from Spongebob Squarepants. The two argue about stuff, I'm not really caring about.
    Team 3D come out and... Ray perfectly relates with me! Team 3D explain that they already have the title shot spot. Steiner goes back to his "fatass" comments and ... oh shit. I seriously can't explain how much I marked out at Brother Ray. I have no clue what the hell was said, I was too busy laughing with Brother Ray's response to Steiner.
    "How can anyone understand what you're saying!?" ~ Brother Ray relates with me.
    "nyanyanyanya nyanyan jiajianya ma!" ~ Brother Ray repeating Steiner's words. I could have been paraphrasing.
    "Show your abs!" ~ Steiner... some sort of homo-erotic attraction to Ray?
 
MATCH THREE
Taylor Wilde defeated Daffney
    Hey, there's an item on a pole! Tonight's just full of Russo! Not two minutes into the match and the tacks are already on the ring and.. barely three minutes into the match Daffney gets her cute ass slammed onto the tacks.
 
    Beautiful People are on their thrones and... what... what? Ok.. so.. Angelina Love compared "Tara" to "tarantula" and... they went to commercial with a tarantula on one of the girl's shoulders. Is that seriously why they went with "Tara" for her name? An idiotic segment.
 
    Team 3D are in Foley's office and want to get things straight and Ray made the moment here by threatening Foley. It would have been awesome for Foley to take the shot, but really, it was better for Foley to beg the team to take a match against Booker and Steiner next week. Weird segment.
 
MATCH FOUR
Steiner defeated Robert Roode
    It was actually a decent match between the two. With as much as I hate on Steiner, people think I don't give the guy props. The dude's just a nut on the mic and I don't think he's exactly all there in the head. He is somewhat skilled when it comes to wrestling.
 
    A couple of backstage things happened, but I missed them due to family situations. The one I did catch was Eric Young becoming a butthurt emo. Rhino shows up and expresses disappointment in Young's actions. Young presents a challenge then headbutts Rhino as a cheapshot. Someone (didn't recognize who) comes to check on Rhino and says something about "giving him a hard time." Rhino snaps at the words "hard time" and throws the guy down. I'm completely lost.
    "Hard time? When the hell did you become a teacher?" ~ I dunno. Didn't know teachers used the term 'hard time.'
 
    Booker T.. says... something.
    "Victory Road!?" ~ Booker T's confused. Surprise surprise.
 
MATCH FIVE
James Storm defeated Booker T
    Real back and forth match between the two, but Storm wins via DQ. Booker uses the beer bottle on Storm's head.
 
TIME-EATING SEGMENT
    AJ Style's out in the ring and called out Joe so he can get some questions answered. Styles asks his questions, but Joe never answered. Joe...... wait... wait a minute... Joe.. Morgan... YES!
    Daniels comes out to save AJ from Joe & Morgan, but Main Event Mafia make their way out to back them up. No clue why the bell's ringing, it wasn't a match.
    Sting comes out and Main Event Mafia leave the ring. Commercial break. Ten minutes left until 11. When we get back we have Sting laying into everyone about their own problems and the usual "stick together" method.
    Nash's response really hit the nail on the head. Sting's plan was "taking too long" while Angle's plans always had them on top. No more honor and no more respect, it's officially all about money. Nash responds with some heartfelt words and gives Nash the bat. He sneaks another bat out from his coat and as Nash tries to attack Sting, Sting strikes back and more or less lays everyone out. Joe gets Sting and soon the entire Mafia was standing tall while Sting lay beaten.
 
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J-LEE'S THOUGHTS
*With that new beard/receding hairline combo, Angle's looking an awful lot like Chavo Guerrero. In all seriousness, it's a great look for Angle at this time in his career.

*Wow.. a lot before the first thirty minutes were up. We have Jarrett/Foley/Angle in the power struggle now. One as an owner, one as shareholder majority, and one as the actual TNA Champion. Samoa Joe joins Mafia, thus bringing a whole new slew of storyline possibilities.
 
*I seriously like the thought of Joe joining the Mafia. Whether it leads him to be a sell out heel or him merely infiltrating the group and break them apart from the inside. It'll be a good result in the end.
 
*"Free Idea: Russo, put Joe and Morgan in a tag team. That'd destroy every team known to man." I wrote that last week and tonight they worked together. Hm....
*The show was just... it was better than last week, but I swear the people editing the show and producing it have a serious case of ADHD, I couldn't keep up with ANY of it.
 
OVERALL
    A few "meh" parts here and there and definitely some confusion if you're not paying attention, but still better than last week. It was a strong show and the majority of it was fun to watch. The story was enhanced while the matches weren't really all that great at all.
 
CURRENT INTEREST: Rhino
    Rhino caught my attention, mainly just to be a emo-bitch. I still don't know what he meant by calling that one dude a teacher.
 
TOP TAG TEAM: Beer Money, Inc.
    I guess you could argue that Main Event Mafia isn't necessarily a tag team, but everyone in the group shined tonight. So as a complete overall effort, it took this spot.
 
TOP SINGLES STAR: Brother Ray
    I fucking LOVED Brother Ray tonight. Everything from mocking Steiner to threatening Foley came off completely in character and in a great way.
 
BEST MATCH: Steiner vs. Roode
    A sub-par match for a sub-par night when wrestling is concerned. Not too much greatness with everything being rushed for the promos. It's amazing how with two hours, they can't fit a story into the product. It's almost like they could have filled the entire night just promos. I wonder if the live audience got pissed off when they saw that they were getting five matches that barely added to a combined 15 minutes each

.

TNA Impact June 18

TIME-EATING SEGMENT
    We start things off tonight with a little time-eating segment with Mick Foley, Jeff Jarrett, AJ Styles, Kurt Angle, and I think Samoa Joe was out there two. No real reason to have anyone other than Jeff and Foley out there, but whatever. It just all lead to the announcement of a three-way tag team match between Joe/Styles vs. Angle/Sting, and Foley/Jarrett against each other.
 
    One more promo before we go to commercial. It was mainly about Raven explaining how he and Abyss were similar and how after their match with each other at Slammiversary, there'd be nothing else to do but die. Something like that.
 
MATCH ONE
Christopher Daniels defeated Amazing Red
    Holy shit, it's Amazing Red! It's been years since I've seen this guy. The two are given a chance to really give the crowd some exciting matches. No psychology included, but sometimes you just need to sit back and watch the fun happen. This is what TNA does better than WWE, when an unknown or a person who's not used as much as other stars show up on TV, they're not simply squashed. Amazing Red was given some time to show his stuff before Daniels wins via B.M.E.
 
    After the match Douglas shows up and rants about how he should be given another chance instead of Daniels. I'm not sure what Douglas really has against Daniels, specifically.
 
    An interview segment between Kong, Saeed (sp?), and Taylor Wilde talking about their match later on against Daffney and Beautiful People.
 
TIME-EATING SEGMENT
    Matt Morgan comes out to the ring and calls out Sting to explain that he really does respect the veterans. He brags a little about himself but then starts asking how he's supposed to be a world champion if he's never been a chance to be a world champion. So he then asks for Sting to give Morgan an  opportunity to beat Sting in a match at TNA Slammiversary.
    Sting replies that not only would Sting accept Morgan into the Mafia, but would give Morgan his position if Morgan beat him. Morgan accepts then tries to attack Sting only for Sting to duck out of the way, showing his experience difference.
 
    A little promo with Jeff Jarret having some sort of Q&A with J.B. It's pretty bad that J.B. needs to have notes to follow along with the show. Jarrett states that after Slammiversary the TNA title will be back where it belongs.
    "There's so many twists in this thing, I'm lost." ~ Aren't we all J.B.
 
MATCH TWO
Raven defeated Jethro Holiday
    This is a lockdown match or falls count anywhere or something. I'm not sure exactly what they called in. Keep in mind, readers, that I'm JUST NOW getting back into TNA so I don't know a whole lot and I missed the commentating of this match when (name) was making his way out to the ring and Raven attacked him.
    Raven shows us that he has what it takes to put on a brutal match while Murdo-- Holiday gives one hell of a fight against Raven. Raven wins the match after Holiday sends himself through the cage in an attempted attack.
 
    After the match, Raven gives insult to injury by DDTing Jethro onto a chair and attempts to put him in  a straightjacket. Before they could accomplish this Abyss comes out and Raven (with Daffney & Dr. Stevie) hightail it out of there.
 
    Back from commercial and Samoa Joe explains that he isn't listening to anyone, but is taking advice from someone. He also explains that AJ Styles is like a brother to him and that like brothers, they fight, but they also figure things out. He shows some passion by saying Main Event Mafia members haven't earned their position in wrestling and that they've taken these things from the real wrestlers. (That's actually an awesome statement when you talk about Steiner and Nash.)
 
    Jesus Christ, another interview segment. This time Abyss laughs like a molesting uncle and does his best Mankind impression. I'm not even sure what other way I could describe it. Just a Mankind-ish promo that you'd expect Mick Foley to do in 1996/1997. The only difference is now Abyss is wearing a face brace that looks like a pair of Liberace's boxers.
 
MATCH THREE
Awesome Kong & Taylor Wilde defeated Angelina Love & Daffney
    My biggest problem with this match is how Daffney's teaming up with Angelina Love. Um... excuse me, but... aren't the Beautiful People the REASON Daffney went "crazy?" Why the hell is she working alongside with them? I understand the whole "common enemy" thing, but if she's "crazy" then why is she conforming to the rules? Victoria shows up after the match and chase away the Beautiful People.
    Consistency issues are terrible in today's wrestling.
 
    Team 3D were on to say something, but unfortunately I had to answer a phone call, so I was unable to get what they said.
 
    A little promo showing ODB with Deaner  - or Beaner or Creamer or whatever his name is - completing his training. This wouldn't be too bad, but they REALLY needed some dumb 80's song for a montage.
 
    Now an interview with Creed/Jay & Machine Guns. Machismo wouldn't shut THE FUCK up and getting on this chick's nerves, which I don't blame her. I was getting sick of Machismo the night he started that lame-ass gimmick. Ok, I'm getting irritated with tonight's show.
 
    Yet, another segment with Beer Money, Inc. and Team 3D are having a little PMS between each other them arguing with each other. Beer Money's enjoying their money and talking about beer still. They already seem wasted.
 
MATCH FOUR
Team 3D and Beer Money, Inc. defeated Lethal Consequences & Motor City Machine Guns 
    Ok, I know TNA has the best tag team division in the country today, but damn. What's with all the tag team matches? I guess it's ok, but this isn't really a match to me since Team 3D and Beer Money were beating the shit out of each other before the match. Then the match starts after Suicide attacks. Team 3D pin Machine Guns for the win after -- you know what. No.
 
    Interview with AJ and Joe. Styles states that he likes competition. Joe says something that kinda sounds like an apology, Style says not to worry about it and... commercial. Wow. Do they just do these segments just for the sake of having them?
 
    Foley and J.B. are... just.. seriously, do they just LEAVE the camera on!? Talking about tweeting (such a DUMB FUCKING FAD) and.. and... and............ WTF .... Billy Gunn's now been reduced to... maintenance. I dunno whether to laugh or cry.
 
    Now J.B. teleports to Angle and they talk about how Angle lost the Godfather spot and how Angle's life has changed and how stress has been relieved. Apparently, Sting is Jesus because now Angle isn't screaming or blowing his head off and is calm for once. First time being calm since his last drug medication.
 
MATCH FIVE
Joe/Styles defeated Angle/Sting & Foley/Jarrett
    This was some great action here with each man using the time left for what was needed to really push their angles for Slammiversary. Jarrett beat the ever-loving crap out of Foley there at the end of the match while Joe was more or less a one man army against both Sting and Angle. Joe won the match after a gruesome muscle buster on Kurt Angle.
 
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J-LEE'S THOUGHTS
*I love how Joe explained the thing with Styles and Daniels. See, this is what a lot of heels/faces lack to do when they team up with someone. Joe and Styles had a brawl a few weeks ago and Joe explains that they're like brothers and that brothers tend to fight, but patch things up. I love this explanation. It's good enough to make me go, "ok, that's cool."
 
*They couldn't do this right with Daffney and Beautiful People teaming up. Why... WHY would Daffney team up with someone from the team that humiliated her just to go after Wilde? This wouldn't have been a problem if she did something to cause her teammate to lose the match or something, but no, they worked so well together, it hardly seemed as though the two had any beef...... where's the beef!?
 
*I just wish we could calm down from the constant use of backstage segments. A good number of tonight's segments could have been left out or combined to save time and either use that time to show other segments or lengthen the matches. I wish they'd stop going to commercial during the main events, especially when there was only 10 minutes left in the show.
 
*Where's Jesse Neal? They promoted the hell out of him, but now he's not even worth mentioning? I'm sure one of those segments could have been traded to show Neal training with Rhino.
 
*Billy Gunn is the janitor, that's hilarious. However, it's irritating at the same time. It reminds me of the days of the wrestling plumber or the wrestling garbage man or the wrestling repo man. OK, Repo Man was cool to watch, but Billy Gunn being a wrestling janitor just makes me wish the Janitors from Scrubs would team up and -- NO! I'M NOT GIVING RUSSO AND CELEBRITY FETISH ANY IDEAS!! NOOOOOOOO!
 
*In any case, the reason this irritates me is because no we'll have to sit through at least one segment a week with someone needing something fixed and having to watch Gunn fucking fix it. I rather just fixed matches than watch Gunn fix a sink.
 
*The Morgan/Sting moment came off really well. Morgan's fun to watch and the way he acts on the mic just seems genuine. I can buy his material.
 
*I really hated how Joe already got his hands on Sting and Angle. What would have been better was for Sting and Angle to win the match and show their unity after having cuffed Joe to a rope and let them destroy Styles. This way, Joe's reputation would have been protected, but the Main Event Mafia's two biggest members didn't have to look like dropouts to the guy. 
 
*Awesome Kong was scary in her promo. Abyss sounded like he was molesting a cat.
 
OVERALL
    Overall, it was a catch here or there show. Nothing too strong tonight and it seemed like they just focused more on backstage segments and trying to have their roster on the show than to have an actual show to begin with. I was starting to lose interest near the end of the night, but I will say one thing. If I had the money, I would order Slammiversary just to see the Morgan/Sting match.
 
CURRENT INTEREST: Matt Morgan
    With no Eric Young in sight, tonight's interest belongs to Matt Morgan. He's really come a long way since his days in WWE. He belongs in TNA and I think the fans are recognizing that. He isn't a WWE "castoff" anymore who riding on a reputation he built in WWE (like Angle, Gunn, Road Dogg and others have). He's making his own reputation there and the writers are surprisingly not fucking him over with lame decisions. I wouldn't be lying when I say this guy has potential to be a TNA World Champion sometime in 2010.
 
TOP TAG TEAM: Beer Money, Inc.
    With all the tag teams looking as though they've PMS all night, I'm gonna have to give Team 3D the win this week. They gained a victory and got their point across effectively, even if they were acting like drama queens. Seriously guys... how long have they been in the business?
 
TOP SINGLES STAR: Samoa Joe
    I would SO love to put Raven here. Cutting an awesome promo you'd only expect to hear from Raven then giving a decent match in such a small amount of time, Raven deserves some recognition, but tonight's night belongs to Samoa Joe. The company's riding on him right now. This whole thing with him going after Main Event Mafia on his own while taking advice from someone (TNA has cameras everywhere backstage, yet can't get a photo of this unknown man?) is getting interesting. It'd be nice to see if Joe ends up turning on everyone and going at it alone or asks others to join his mission. In the end, Joe was standing strong tonight and looking like the strongest force in TNA at the end of the night.

Free Idea: Russo, put Joe and Morgan in a tag team. That'd destroy every team known to man.
 
BEST MATCH: The Three-Way Tag Team Match
    The main event was the best match of the night. Placing all the players in the ring with other and just letting them go at it. Tonight wasn't a strong night, wrestling-wise, so this is by far the best they had.

TNA Impact June 4th

 It's TNA and we start off with a brief review of what happened last week. This is my first actual coverage of a show, so be gentle. I will warn one thing, I will NOT call action play-by-play. Especially for some of TNA's performers who half of them perform moves I don't even know the names of.
 
    Lauren opens the show up with an attempted interview with Shane Douglas who says he's aiming to make an impact for TNA "for a very long time."
 
MATCH ONE
Kiyoshi & Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Chris Daniels & Suicide
    Pretty sure I misspelled Sheik's name. This is my first time seeing Kiyoshi and Suicide (character) in action. It was decent tag team action between the two teams. I wasn't too impressed by Kiyoshi or Daniels, but they weren't necessarily bad either. It didn't help that the commentators spent the whole match bickering over how they though Daniels was Suicide.
    Near the end, Suicide did a dive to the outside on Sheik while Daniels and Kiyoshi were in the ring. While the ref was checking on Sheik, the M.C.M.G & Lethal Consequences came out and start pounding down on Suicide, taking him to the back. With Suicide MIA, Shane Douglas showed up and clocked Daniels with the chain again, which allowed Kiyoshi and the "suddenly injure-free Sheik" to gain a victory.
 
Winners: Kiyoshi & Sheik Bashir
 
    Shane Douglas decides to take a seat (why doesn't he stand) and TNA's cameramen decide to give us a full frontal of his crotch while he talks. Douglas talks about how he watches TNA RELIGIOUSLY (hahahaaa!) and that he's been seeing how Jeff Jarrett, Mick Foley, and others are getting a second chance, but he never did (apparently). So he demands to get a second chance and until Jeff Jarrett gives him that chance, he'll make life a living Hell for Daniels (why?) until he does.
    Never mind the fact he's allowed to get into the arena and that TNA will never buff up security with that threat, as fans we have to ignore that kind of stuff.
 
    It cuts to J.B. and Foley discussing Foley's decision on defending the title once a year and comparing it to being like the playoffs, the Super Bowl, etc. Just as Foley mentions the possibility of defending the title FOUR TIMES out of the year before Kip shows up and asks for a job. Foley tells him that he'll consider it, but that things are tight around there with money.
    Nash then shows up and discusses his payment, because apparently he's not getting paid enough to do nothing. Foley gives him 4x his normal pay.
    "I don't care if one person watches or 50 million people watch, I just want to get paid." ~ Story of Kevin Nash's career.
 
    Lauren's talking to Lethal Consequences and Motor City Machine Guns about their match against each other. They talk about how while they dislike each other, they have a common goal in unmasking Suicide.
 
MATCH TWO
Consequences Creed & Chris Sabin vs. Beer Money Inc.
    Second tag team match of the night and I'm a Happy Jesse right now. Beer Money Inc. is my favorite tag team going on right now. The way how Chris Sabin and Creed seemed a little off just adds to the story of the match. The two aren't tag team partners and shouldn't know how to work with each other. That combined with their teams' rivalry with each other just helps add to that.
    The British Invasion made their way out to the ring and were about to interfere until Team 3D came out to keep them out of the match. Since they didn't interfere and had no impact in the match, Beer Money gained the advantage and got Creed in the D.W.I. before winning the match,
 
Winners: Beer Money, Inc.
 
    Coming back after commercial, the Beautiful People were beating the crap out of Victoria only to have Victoria fight back and completely own the group by herself. Why isn't she Queen of Wrestling, yet?
    We get a little rundown of Slammiversary so far and get a brief clip of an interview-to-come... then another commercial (barely four minutes of the show this time).
 
    Lauren's all over the place tonight, this time talking to Daffney guess Daf's supposed to be crazy, but she's really just coming off as fake. Personality Rule #1: IF YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN YOU'RE CRAZY, YOU'RE NOT CRAZY! You're just a poser and we who are actually crazy (hehehehe) will call you out right away.
    In any case, she's apparently angry cause her "best friend" betrayed her something.
 
TIME-EATING-SEGMENT
    We're given an interview by Main Event Mafia.
    Nash is given first chance to express his words and apparently, he's set in life and would rather than put himself in danger, he'd rather walk home. To him, it's all about money and being paid and since this is TNA, they have no problem giving him 4x the pay and letting him get away with walking out.
    Everyone else gave their reasons for being involved with this situation and how M.E.M. will fight back with anyone who attempts to fight with the M.E.M. Angle starts getting heated up until Sting calms him down and states that they do things HIS way.
    "He's FAT!" ~ Steiner's a poet at heart.
    "Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah!" ~ Booker's excited.
 
MATCH THREE
Daffney (duck) vs. Taylor Wilde
    Although I just ranted about her, Daffney's pretty hot, though she did steal Melina's entrance, which is kind of a "meh." Not even two minutes into the match, Raven and Dr. Stevie came out to "observe" the match - in other words, distract. It was a short match with Daffney gaining the win.
 
Winner: Daffney
 
    After the match, Daffney started to attack Wilde. Lauren comes out to help Wilde while Raven and Stevie (along w/ Daffney) stay in the ring. Raven gives a little promo over why he and Stevie chose Abyss as their victim. It was a short promo, but a very good one.
 
TIME-EATING-SEGMENT
    Jeff Jarrett makes his way out to the ring and calls out Eric Young. Jarrett attempts to apologize to Young before neglecting him over the years due to trying to run things and explain that he knew Young accepted how things were last week with that he had his chance. Jarrett then explains that he and Young could chop up what happened last week due to immaturity or inexperience or they could take it as far as he (Young) wants to take it.
    Young's voice is just so... off. Is he trying to pull of a new voice with his new attitude? He doesn't sound threatening, he sounds like he needs a cough drop. Anyway, he praises Jarrett for his accomplishments then explains how Jeff's childhood was similar to his own in that despite their fathers being away for so long (Eric w/o a father and Jeff's father being a wrestler), they've both aimed to reach the American dream (no, not Dusty).
    Young explains that while Jarrett made a vow to not be like his dad, Jarrett's turning into another version of his father. Young gets under Jeff's skin by explaining that Jeff is putting everyone else second and wrestling first. Even going as far as questioning his love for his daughters. At that moment, Jarrett bitch-slapped Young and a brawl started.
    After a bit of action (mainly with Jarrett attacking Hebner), it cuts to Foley who explains a bit of shock at Jarrett's actions before sort of introducing a couple of a security guards.
 
    Coming back from commercial, we get a bit of backstory on this new dude named Jesse Neal, who was a sailor in a previous life. Apparently, he's just a fan, but they actually showed him training with Rhino. He gives a few comments with Lauren (she multiplying?) about his best friend and all this and that before heading for his match.
 
MATCH FOUR
Jesse Neal vs. Matt Morgan
    TNA's doing GREAT with Morgan lately by pushing him without having him squash everyone in sight. This is supposedly Neal's first match in wrestling, period. I like how Neal doesn't look so flashy in attire and looks like he just got out of a workout session, it sort of adds to him being a noob. I hate his hair though, looks pretty retarded.
    The match wasn't too interesting or too exciting, but it fit for the angle. Morgan wins the match and gets to remain looking good, but Neal gets to get a feel in the ring and shows a bit of offense at the same time. Morgan wins by a big boot.
 
Winner: Matt Morgan
 
    A vignette showing ODB and Dean in a "training boot camp" with Dean failing at.. well.. everything. The only thing is this isn't a wrestling workout, it's an obstacle course workout. No... not even that. It's the "poor man's workout." Lifting barrels, running through tires, using paint cans as weights, etc. In other words... idiotic and insulting to the intelligence of wrestling fans.
 
TIME-EATING-SEGMENT
    Mick Foley cuts a promo about Jeff Jarrett "snapping" and attacking TNA officials. He talks about Jarrett being a threat to everyone in TNA and that Foley's "reaction" will be met next week and that... it will be... HARDCOOORE!
    A little bland, but still good. He didn't have to go into the ring for this.
 
    Sting's giving an interview with J.B. and states that Main Event Mafia is a family and have gotten stronger and more unified. Matt Morgan shows up with excitement and asks where his contract is so he can be a Mafia member. Sting tells Morgan that he needs respect and when Morgan climbs he does, Sting denies it and walks away.
    Morgan takes it as an insult and says that the only reason he isn't getting is because he isn't champion. Thus, his next goal.
    This was a great promo. I love Morgan's excitement and the way he speaks. A company has to be filled with idiots not to keep this guy (WWE).
 
    Booker T & Steiner w/ J.B...... oh this will be fun.
    Booker taunts Joe about not being able to bust him open. He says it in so many words, but could have knocked it off into five wirds.
    Steiner taunts Joe with.. well.. saying the same thing except adding in "FAT PIG!"
    What the hell is with Steiner and fat people? That's like his number one insult to people.
 
MATCH FIVE
King-of-the-Mountain Qualifying Match
Lethal Lockdown Rules
Kevin Nash vs. Samoa Joe
    Interesting that this was the only KOTM qualifying match tonight while last week, we had two. But oh well. Joe was a little late due to talking to "someone" backstage outside the door before making his way out. Since this is a Lethal Lockdown Rules match, it's a cage match that I guess involves kendo sticks and other weapons.
    Joe's beating the hell out of Nash with the kendo stick and Nash is doing the same to Joe early in the match. They cut to commercial during the match, which kind of killed it for me. Nothing spectacular happened in the match aside from a few items used on each other. Joe held Nash in a rear naked choke for a bit before finishing him off with a lethal shot with another kendo stick.
 
Winner: Samoa Joe
 
    Joe wins the match and qualifies for the King of the Mountain match at Slammiversary and that's a wrap.
 
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J-LEE'S THOUGHTS
*If Shane Douglas isn't on the roster, why did Lauren go searching for him for an interview attempt? Does she just walk around backstage with a cameraman and a mic to find people to interview?
 
*Why do people in tag team matches ALWAYS run to the back when they're getting jumped instead of trying to get into the ring? Yeah, you'll get your ass kicked, but at least it increases the chances of winning by DQ.
 
*I'm still a little sick of the interference-rate in TNA. Almost every match tends to get one or two people coming out to interfere in one way or another. Whether or not the person actually takes part in attacking someone doesn't matter. The mere fact that they even tried doing so just shows that TNA aren't exactly willing to show 100% clean wins. This is a minor gripe.
 
*Daffney's a little off for me. I mean, it just seems like she's trying so hard to be crazy you know she isn't. It's similar to "Sycho" Sid. Cutting hair, acting like a spaz, and random screaming isn't "crazy," it's "pretending to be crazy." Trust me, I know.
 
*The Young/Jarrett segment was great. THIS is how segments are supposed to be done. An attempt to add to a feud. Nothing more, nothing less. Of course, things can change. Not all segments need to be so serious or end off in a brawl, but they should always add to the feud or an angle going on.
 
*Jesse Neal just seems like a huge flop. Anyone who gets in an angle involving any sort of pity or sympathy for a "dead friend" just irks me. I lost a grandfather who loved wrestling, where's Regal to come and train me!? In any case, they're constantly mentioning his dead friend which is so similar to Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero. To me, it's poor taste to make a career out of a dead friend. Whether this friend was real or not, I just wonder that if he was real, if he necessarily wanted his buddy to "make it" off of his name. If his friend was a fake person just to include to the angle, that's even more tasteless. Why? Cause there are real people out there who's friends and family are dying in needless war or terrorist attacks. I hope this changes over time.
 
*BTW: My "time-eating-segments" isn't necessarily a segment of the show that's terrible, just a segment (be it promo, interview, etc) that takes up a lot of time on the show. Since TNA tends to have, like, fifty segments per show, I decided to point out the bigger, more important, or unique ones.
 
OVERALL
    Overall, it was a good show. Some nitpicking here and there, but still very good. TNA's REALLY picked up here lately where it's become my preferred show out of the week. I just wish a few matches were longer and I could do without the interferences in many of the matches, but it didn't ruin the experience for me. Not this time at least.
 
CURRENT INTEREST: Eric Young
    Eric Young is the guy to watch right now. He's been the push-boy for so long with a history of crappy and lame gimmicks, even being involved in a few crummy-ass angles. It's so easy to overlook him, I know I did. His heel turn right now is the absolute best thing they could do for him.
 
TOP TAG TEAM: Beer Money, Inc.
    The only tag team this week that looked great in a match, on cue with everything, and didn't come off as looking like a bunch of noobs.
 
TOP SINGLES STAR: Samoa Joe
    Joe takes this spot for not only gaining entrance into the King of the Mountain Match, but also for obtaining the first step in eliminating the Main Event Mafia. I absolutely love this angle! It reminds me of something that you'd see in a MegaMan game or something. Sting as Dr. Wily, Angle as Elect Man, Booker as Cut Man, Steiner as Guts Man, and Nash as Bomb Man. Joe has to go through each one before getting to Sting.
 
BEST MATCH: Morgan vs. Neal
    Yeah, it wasn't a great match, but none of the other matches were really anything to be excited about. I believe that when it fits with the angle plus action in the match itself, this one really fits. If the Joe/Nash had been a little better other than a couple kendo stick shots, then that could have taken the spot here. Though what's been done was done the Morgan/Neal match was exciting and fit very well into the program.

TNA Impact May 14th

 

TNA Impact May 14th

 

We start off the night with Mick Foley coming to the ring. They talk about what everyone is sacrificing at the Sacrifice PPV. He announces that Jeff Jarrett will not be a part of Impact. He says he might have said things and done things to cause that. He then pulls out a DVD that is supposedly showing an incident in Nashville. He says that he will show the DVD to everyone in the course of the night. He then exits the ring.

They then go to the backstage area with The Main Event Mafia. Basically Scott Steiner is acting like he is taking over the MEM. Apparently Kurt Angle has put him in charge while he is away.  Kevin Nash then says that Jenna wants Sharmel banned from The MEM. Scott says he will deal with it and that Kevin and Booker need to concentrate on their matches tonight.

They then show the recap of last week when Lethal Conquences accused Daniels of being Suicide.

Christopher Daniels VS Chris Sabin

Of course Alex Shelley accompanies Sabin to the ring. They had promised that they will reveal that Daniels is Suicide. A great match as expected from these two. Lethal Conquences comes to the ramp to watch the match. Daniels goes for the win but Shelley interferes turning the tides Sabins way. Daniels knocks Shelley off the ring apron and then nails the Best Moonsault ever to get the win.

Winner: Christopher Daniels

They then go back to Mick Foley’s office where he is talking to three refs. He finally picks Earl Hefner and tells him that under NO circumstances is he to DQ Samoa Joe in his match against Eric Young. I guess Eric really made Foley mad earlier when he asked for a chance in the company.

When we come back they show Scott Steiner with Nash’s girlfriend. He gets her to agree to meet with him and Sharmel.

Lauran is backstage with Angelina Love. She says that she called the only man trust and then Cute Kip shows up. He says he is taking on Awesome Kong in a stretcher match tonight.

Eric Young VS Samoa Joe

Samoa just opens up on Young from the beginning. Joe just dominates this match. Joe locks on the submission… rear choke hold and Eric Young passes out.

Winner: Samoa Joe

After the match Joe carries Eric Young out of the ring and back to the back.

When they come back from the commercial they show Joe put Eric in the trunk of a car. The car then pulls off. They hint around that the person driving the car is the person Joe has been talking to.

They then show Taylor Wilde on her blind date. Daffney shows up and attacks her. I guess they are both in the Monsters Ball at Sacrifice.

Cute Kip VS Awesome Kong in a stretcher match

Kong uses the chair to knock Kip out. She then takes the chair and puts it on Kips neck and jumps on it. She does it twice and puts him on the stretcher. He isn’t able to make the 10 count and loses the match.

Winner: Awesome Kong

Sharmel and Scott Steiner are shown backstage. He gets her to agree to a meeting with Nash’s girlfriend.

They then show Team 3D backstage talking about their Team 3D Tag Team Tournament. They were then attacked and left laying by The British Invasion.

The British Invasion VS Amazing Red/ Suicide

Suicide starts it off. The Eagle has a feeling that The Motor City Machine Guns will play a factor in this match. The British Invasion then takes over the match. Amazing Red then gets the hot tag and Suicide takes over the match. The Motor City Machine Guns then run into the ring and double drop kick Suicide. That allows The British Invasion to get the win.

Winner: The British Invasion

This means they will meet Beer Money Inc at Sacrifice. After the match MCMG enter the ring and take out Amazing Red. They  corner Suicide when Lethal Consquences enter the ring. They then go to commercial.

When they come back they have Suicide cornered. They tackle him and as soon as they go to pull off the mask Daniels comes running down to make the save. After they clean house they shake hands as Daniels tells him that he owes him one.

We then come back to Scott Steiner, Sharmel, and Jenna. They all start to argue.

Kevin Nash VS No Limits in a handicap match

No Limit gets the advantage at first but Nash soon takes over. Kevin Nash takes off his elbow brace and nails the jackknife powerbomb for the win.

Winner: Kevin Nash

After the match Nash gets on the mic. He says this world revolves around one thing and that’s violence. He says at Sacrifice he will be the violent one against Samoa Joe.

They then show AJ Styles backstage with Lauren. He says he will not quit at Sacrifice against Booker T.

Booker T VS Jethro Holiday in a I Quit Match

Jethro takes the advantage at first but as soon as it goes outside Booker T gets the upper hand. Holiday is asked several times whether he quits but says no. One time his response was that Sharmel looks good naked. Booker T nails him with a chair cause Sharmel distracted the ref. Booker T then nails his scissor kick and Jethro Holiday gives up.

They then show Mick Foley back at the production truck telling them that when he says so play the DVD. Mick is on his way to the ring.

Mick Foley comes to the ring and tells them in the back to play the DVD. They show Jeff talking about his matches and showing us the arena where he wrestled. They then show Mick Foley attacking Jeff from behind. He beats him up and kicks him around. You can hear Jeff yelling Mick, Mick. Foley then grabs a chair and nails Jeff with it. As they are playing this Mick is watching from the ring laughing. The film then ends with Foley saying he is headed to the Impact Zone.

After the footage they show Mick in the ring saying he is partially responsible for the Jeff not being there. They go off the air with Mike Tenay saying that next week when Jeff Jarrett returns there will be hell to pay.

The Eagles Thoughts

Not a bad Impact. I see they are building feuds fairly well. Pretty good match with Chris Sabin VS Daniels. The British Invasion VS Suicide and Amazing Red was pretty good too. I am looking forward to seeing Jeff Jarretts return next week.

I am The Eagle and I am flying out of hereeeee!!!!!